Wait that's not right
by EggyMiNa
Summary: Hey Sasuke...how come you're so small?" SasuNaru, SasuNaruNeji. May have Threesome.


Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

Author's Note: Hey! I had this on my computer for some time now and decided just to post it for the heck of it. I Hope you'll enjoy it.

Warnings: This story contains **YAOI**, in other words: male/male action. Don't like, don't read. Enjoy!

-----

Everyone was found sleeping and dreaming in their beds in Konoha, waiting for tomorrow to start their daily routine. As the sun peeked over the horizon, people saw this time to wake up and start a new day. However, a certain blonde, blued eyed boy thought much differently from the rest.

The said blonde boy continued his grumbling and turning to block the sunshine that was threatening to break his wonderful dreamland. Determined to win, the blonde made a big flop on his bed…and bounced right to the floor with a _THUD._

"Naruto! Stop making so much noise! It's too early!" A lady bellowed from downstairs, while getting the table ready for breakfast.

Naruto groaned and rubbed his head from the fall. "Itai...what a wake-up call." The blonde squinted at the bright sun and then to the glaring numbers reading 8:36.

"Eugh, it's too early and..." the boy stared glared straight at the sun. "I'm not gonna let you win ya hear me?!" pointing straight at the sun in determination and dropped back on the bed.

"Naruto! Wake up ya lazy ass! It's time for breakfast!" came from the kitchen.

Naruto wrapped himself around the blankets like a burrito and slipped his head under the pillow, willing himself back to sleep.

Just when he thought was going to get some sleep, the blankets was suddenly yanked from his body. Having the sheets tightly rolled around him, the blonde went down with it.

"Ow! What the hell was that for?!" Naruto rubbed his growing bump on his head, knowing it was _way _too early to lose this many brain cells.

"Ya little brat! Is that a way to talk to your elders? I should flog you for that!" The angry woman with similar blonde hair yelled, throwing the orange sheets back on the twin sized bed.

The blonde stood up from the floor and stretched his aching muscles. "Neh Obaa-san, y'know I was just kidding" Naruto said through his yawn.

Obaa-san screeched to a halt and slowly turned around to direct her menacing glares to the prankster. "What did you say squirt?"

Now, Naruto knew his limits, and being a prankster, he certainly knew how to run when needed. So that's what he did. He ran down those stairs to the safety of his bathroom like a Tom and Jerry chase and locked the door. After doing his things in the bathroom, the blonde walked to the kitchen, only to be greeted with the burning smell of onions and a bowl of cereal.

"Ehh? You wake me up for this? A bowl of mucky cereal?"(1) With that said Naruto lifted the spoon of the soggy cereal and dropped it into the bowl. The cereal made a sickening sound of _PLOPPLOP_ sending milk flying everywhere.

"What you trying to say huh? Can't appreciate the food in front of you?" The blonde woman slammed the knife into the onion with every word.

"But Obaa-"A knife grazed the whiskered cheeks. "But Tsunade!" Tsunade turned around with the knife in her hands bearing a…crazy smile.

Naruto sweat dropped and backed away from the cereal and laughed nervously. "Uh…Y'know what? I'll just uh…go out and eat." While Tsunade blinked, Naruto took that wee second to bolt out of the backdoor screaming a "Bye!" on the way out.

Naruto heaved and panted before coming into a halt with both his hands on his knees. "Phew, I swear that Obaa-san goes through more mood swings than…than…" Naruto pondered his joke before quickly shaking his golden locks back and forth.

"Doh, I can't even make a joke anymore. I need fooood." Naruto whimpered as he rubbed his grumbling stomach. Being too distracted with his stomach, he failed too see a flash of pink and crashed into it.

"Hey watch i-! Naruto?" Naruto opened his eyes from the impact and looked up at the green eyes of his former crush.

"Ehh?! Sorry Sakura chan!" Naruto smiled bashfully while scratching the back of his head.

"Heh, it's no problem Naruto." The pinked hair kunoichi smiled and waved off his apology with an annoyed face.

"Er, are you sure Sakura? You looked a little…" Naruto looked at the vein popping out of her neck. "Upset?"

"Oh! Naruto it's not you, I'm just having a bad morning that's all." Sakura rubbed her elbows and noticed it was getting a little too chapped.

"Really? What happened?! Did someone hurt you?! Tell me!" Naruto asked worriedly and started groping Sakura to check any injuries. Sakura popped Naruto on the head and crossed her arms. The blonde rubbed his head the umpteenth time and pouted with teary eyes. Sakura immediately removed Naruto's hand and started massaging the bump with a sad smile. Naruto was always too kind for his own good. Sometimes she worries…

"I'm sorry Naruto. I shouldn't have let it out on you. It's nothing serious. It's just that some of the guys at the hospital decided to tell me this ridiculous joke." Sakura massaged a little too hard at remembering the incident.

"Ouch, Sakura!" Sakura apologized with a laugh. "So what did those guys say?" Naruto listened on intently.

Sakura giggled and scratched her cheek lightly. "Well it's just that these came up with this theory that if you take your shoe size." Sakura pointed to Naruto's shoes. "And you divide it by two." Sakura held up two fingers. "And add one." Sakura brought down one finger to make a one.

"Yeah yeah?! What do you get? A dog? A sex equation? What?!" Naruto asked impatiently with such eager.

"Well…" Sakura blushed hard enough to match her hair and sighed. "You get your-"Sakura used both her index finger to draw an imaginary line. "Penis size."

Naruto stared at Sakura with a confusing look and blushed lightly at the supposed "joke".

"I-is that s-so?" Naruto gulped and looked up the emerald eyes, which was focusing on anything but Naruto's face.

"Uh, Well, You know! It's not true! It's just a bunch of tulip made up from guys with no lives!" The pink medic screeched, trying to hide the growing blush.

"How do you know Sakura? Did you test it out?" Naruto tilted his head with a knowing smirk on his face.

"N-No! I did not! I-I." Sakura stammered and waved her hands wildly in attempt to make another swat at Naruto's head.

"Hey! I know! I could test it out!" Naruto pointed at himself and smiled brightly at the idea of proving something. _Heh heh! Maybe I can be a scientist! _

"Bu-But Naruto it's not-"But before Sakura can protest, she was staring at the empty spot of what used to be Naruto.

Sakura smacked her forehead and regret even telling the story in the first place. However, relieved that she didn't have to tell the blonde that she did, in fact, test that out herself. Sakura blushed at remembering her knocking out one of the ANBU guards when they wondered why she was measuring their feet. Sakura waved off these thoughts and massaged her head of the migraine coming. She just hopes to god that she wouldn't have to go through that again.

"Hey! That's the girl! Right there!"

Sakura turned around to see the face she imprinted her fist with and sprinted down the village streets with the ANBU guard right at her tail.

_Oh shit! Why me?!!_

-0-0-

The blonde sunshine skipped happily down the streets looking for his first victim. Now that Sakura was so nice to tell him about this new found discovery, he was going to test it out, even if it killed him!

_Now who should I pick?_

Naruto glanced down the intersection of the roads and inside the stores. Surprisingly, in the usually bustling town, there was no one that caught his attention.

_Oh, right! There's gotta be someone in the training fields!_

Naruto jumped up on one of the roofs and hopped his merry butt there. Much faster and easier than walking yes?

Stopping on one of the tall tree branches in the training fields, he quickly skimmed over the landscape with his hands above his eyes. Just when he was about to give up, he spotted two figures sparring. Naruto almost smacked himself for missing the obvious _clanging_ and_ whooshing_ from the two.

Naruto shot off the tree and landed gracefully near, but not too near, the fighting scene. As the blonde got closer, he could clearly make out the two figures. One had long brown hair, tied in a loose ponytail, with white tank-top and brown shorts. Neji, known for his Byakugen, let out punches aiming at the opponents vital points. However, his opponent was not a push over and if Neji's sweat and ripped clothes wasn't obvious, then there's a problem.

His sparring partner, had raven hair, and instead of the mismatched colors, decided to wear all black, excluding his shoes. With his sharingan activated, Naruto quickly knew it was Sasuke.

Naruto watched with awe and amazement to see two of the greatest jonins fighting with determination and power. But Naruto couldn't help but wonder why Sasuke hadn't even bothered calling him out to spar. Usually both he and his teammate would spar regularly everyday, even after missions. The blonde couldn't help but feel a little annoyed and neglected.

_Psh! Find someone better to replace me teme?_

Naruto pouted and, without any regard to the fight, brought his index and thumb to his mouth, and with added chakra, whistled.

The sound of screeching chalkboards was enough to halt the two fighters in mid-air and rebounded away from each other. Both whipped there heads toward the source with the same surprised face.

"Naruto?!"

The said blonde crossed his arms at frowned at the two sweating ninjas.

"Naruto? What are you doing here?" The brunette asked, wiping the sweat from his forehead.

"Oh I don't know. Just wondering where all my friends were." Naruto bit out annoyingly, forgetting all about his little experiment.

"Hn, friends? Dobe, you have no friends." Sasuke smirked at how that small comment can tick off his cute teammate. However, Naruto didn't respond to the remark and ignored his team mate completely.

The blonde bounced over to the brunette and pounced on his back, sending Neji to topple over.

"Whoa, Naruto wha-?" "So what were you guys fighting for?" Naruto interrupted the blushing shinobi. Being distracted by the sway of the grass, he failed to notice that both had tensed to the question.

"W-we were just…sparring! Yeah!" Both males nodded to the answer and hoped that Naruto held up his title of being stupid and fall for it. Naruto looked skeptically between them and shrugged his shoulders and jumped off of Neji's back.

"Oh…whatever then." Sasuke let out a sigh of relief and glanced at the blonde's back. The reason they were fighting, was standing right in front of them. Both prodigies happen to collide near Naruto's apartment, in search of the blonde. As they were waiting, and for the sake of a conversation, what's better to do but talk about your current obsession?

-----

Author's Note: Oi where the hell did I stop on? Heh heh…bleah. Please review and tell me how I did! Bad, good, ugly? Shouldn't deserve to continue anymore? ….


End file.
